


That Bad, Huh?

by StarlingHawke (Bowm8935)



Series: Not Your Traditional Soulmate AU [2]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M, Soulmates, Swearing, but it's primarily fluff, the beginning of smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-08
Updated: 2017-04-08
Packaged: 2018-10-16 05:02:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10564167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bowm8935/pseuds/StarlingHawke
Summary: Follow-up to "What Kind Are We?" and I highly suggest reading it first, though it's not strictly necessary.Six months after the end of the previous fic, Zen finds himself stressing over how to confess his love to Saeran.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I told myself I'd work on my huge list of other things I need to write, and my brain said "nope!" so here's the result of that.

Wooing is hard.

A lot harder than Zen expected, at any rate. He's successfully wooed in the past with a bat of his eye, with songs and flowers and proclamations of his feelings, but this is different. None of those seem fitting in the current situation and without the normal staples of romanticism, he finds himself without any ideas how to convince someone he's worth it, that a relationship is worth it.

Because Saeran is different from anyone he's ever met, and Zen wants him more than life itself.

Not only is he different by the distinguishing factor that he is _male_ and everyone Zen's chased in the past has been _female,_ but he's also Zen's soulmate. Which should make things easier, right?

Nope. Bitter from the get go about the very idea of soulmates, Saeran made it very clear that he has no desire to be with someone _solely_ because of soulmate status.

But he _had_ said he was willing to give a romantic relationship with Zen a chance since they were friends first, which is one of the many reasons Zen finds himself staring around the mall hopelessly, in search of a gift. It’s almost six months to the day since Saeran had found Zen in his clearing and revealed the tattoo matching Zen’s scar, six months of a very slow courtship during which Zen’s been falling deeper and deeper in love with his white-haired, green-eyed companion. Their first kiss wasn’t until Christmas - almost three months in- when Saeran chose to drag Zen under the mistletoe as a way of saying “I’m ready.”

 

 

> _“Where are you taking me, babe?” Zen laughed, following Saeran as he wound through the throngs of people waiting to donate during the Christmas event. Zen had made sure that he’d be able to attend this year, especially since it was Saeran’s first year participating; he wanted to be there to support and spend time with his boyfriend._
> 
> _Saeran looked sharp in a brand-new suit, a soft light grey paired with a vest and tie matching the color of Zen's burgundy suit. Zen had switched out his own vest and bow tie to match Saeran's colors; he was quite proud of how dashing they looked standing next to each other and spent no small amount of time bragging about it._
> 
> _Yet for how much they matched, there were plenty of obvious differences in their choice of fashion. Saeran was wearing a choker, though he'd made sure to find one the color of his outfit. The fairly  recent addition of snake bites was unique to Saeran, as was the eyeliner he chose to wear. His hair still wildly did what it wanted, curling around his eyes, ears, at the nape of his neck._
> 
> _Zen, on the other hand, had his hair styled and pulled back, held in place by a shimmering silver ribbon. The rest of him was au natural, as per usual._
> 
> _“You'll see,” was all Saeran responded with, glancing back over his shoulder with a sly smirk. Zen felt his own grin widen, happiness and excitement bubbling up inside. Saeran rarely took charge like this, but whenever he did, Zen was always in for a big surprise._
> 
> _They ended up backstage, away from everyone else and in a corner that looked like it had been left abandoned on purpose. It was private, cozy and not warmer in the slightest. Zen couldn't help but shiver a little, looking around him in curiosity. Before he could voice any questions, Saeran let go of his hand and turned to face him, stepping in closer. Their breath turned white in the chilly air, mixing between the two of them as Saeran slowly pressed his body up against Zen’s. A finger came to rest against Zen’s mouth when he opened it, and he followed Saeran’s gaze as it rose up, up, up. There, nestled against the overhang, was a sprig of mistletoe. Eyes wide, Zen glanced back down to see Saeran blushing but grinning._
> 
> _“Are you sure?” Despite the fact that this seemed staged, Zen felt the need to ask. This relationship was important to him and he wanted to make sure to do_ everything _right. Saeran rolled his eyes and nodded. All hesitancy gone, Zen reached out and cupped Saeran’s cheek with one hand, the other lacing their fingers back together as he leaned down and kissed his boyfriend for the first time that night._

The memory sends a thrill shooting through him and Zen brings his fingers to his lips, recalling how it had felt to have those chapped lips pressed to his. He’d felt like his heart would burst from love that night.

If only he could’ve predicted how much further he’d fall yet.

Dropping his hand, he glances around the mall, mind racing as he tries to come up with the perfect item to give Saeran tonight. Six months is nothing in the span of a lifetime; Zen knows this, yet six months has felt like an eternity spent with Saeran. He’d been in the process of falling in love before they agreed to try this, and it took almost nothing to push him the rest of the way. Six months in love feels like a lot longer.

And tonight he wants to tell Saeran how he feels.

A thought pops into his head and Zen grins, turning on his heel to head to a store he hadn’t considered before. It’s definitely not conventional and he’s sure Saeran will just roll his eyes and call him a nerd, but if it makes him smile, then it’ll all be worth it.

* * *

Dinner at the restaurant Zen chose goes by swimmingly and Saeran agrees to heading back to Zen’s place to watch a movie. So far, everything’s falling into place with the plan Zen made and as they round the corner to his apartment, he has to take a few deep breaths. The big moment is quickly approaching and his nerves are spiking, but it’s okay. He can do this, he knows he can.

“It’s nice to be able to ride this again,” Saeran comments as Zen parks the bike, sliding off and unbuckling the helmet. Ah, that’s right; Zen only had the chance to take Saeran out a couple of times before winter rolled around and each time Saeran had enjoyed it as much, if not more, than Zen himself.

Pulling off his own helmet and taking Saeran’s, Zen nods as he puts them away. “It is. I’ll have to make sure to take my prince out on as many rides this year as he wants~” He winks and Saeran groans, shaking his head and turning to head up to the door with his hands shoved in his jacket’s pockets. Chuckling, Zen follows; the speed of which Saeran’s walking suggests he has one thing on his mind right now.

Sure enough, as soon as the door is closed behind them Saeran has Zen pinned, hands slipping under Zen’s coat to grasp his waist as their lips slot together. Zen smiles into the kiss, bringing one of his hands to the small of Saeran’s back to press him closer while the other rests at the nape of his neck. People will talk no matter what, but one rule Zen’s felt obliged to follow - at least for now - is that him kissing someone in public is off-limits. It could be disastrous and while he wants to put love over everything, he has to have a successful career if he wants to take care of Saeran one day.

Assuming Saeran will _let_ Zen take care of him, that is.

It causes Zen no small amount of guilt to know that Saeran gets frustrated that he has to hide his affection. It’s an interesting conundrum in and of itself; Saeran’s not the biggest fan of PDA but his jealousy knows no bounds. Zen being in the public eye and popular enough to often have to toss out a few autographs on every trip isn’t easy for Saeran, especially not with the more _handsy_ fans. Still, he’s always managed to keep himself under control until they walk through the door - then all bets are off. At least, as far as kissing goes.

Nothing happened today that should have triggered anger or jealousy in Saeran, and yet the way he’s kissing Zen suggests otherwise. Passionate but with aggressiveness that suggests Saeran’s trying to claim him, Zen responds but lets Saeran guide him. A nibble on Zen’s lower lip followed by a tug on it and then Saeran’s dipping down to bite gently along Zen’s jaw, his grip tightening on Zen’s waist. Zen feels a nudge when Saeran reaches where jaw meets neck and he tilts his head up, granting Saeran the access he’s desiring.

“Saeran…” Zen groans when Saeran starts nipping his way down Zen’s neck, gradually biting harder as he continues. Zen’s own hold on Saeran’s neck increases and he twines his fingers into the light red strands of hair, jerking on them when Saeran nips particularly hard at the junction of his neck and shoulder. Saeran growls in response, dropping his hands and stepping back, fingers suddenly working at the buttons on Zen’s jacket. Shoving it down Zen’s shoulders, it flutters to the floor in a pile of white that neither pay any heed to when Saeran’s mouth descends upon Zen’s once more.

He’s wild tonight and Zen’s hardpressed to keep himself under control, especially when Saeran unexpectedly rolls his hips against Zen’s. Zen moans loudly into Saeran’s mouth, his grip on Saeran’s neck tightening when Saeran does it again. Shit. They’ve never gone much further than this but with how much Saeran seems to have thrown himself into it, Zen wouldn’t be surprised if he is intending to. Which… doesn’t fit very well with Zen’s plan. At least, not yet.

It takes all of the strength he can muster to break the kiss, letting his head loll forward to rest on Saeran’s shoulder. “Saeran,” he pants harshly, dropping both of his hands to rest on Saeran’s hips. “I can’t control myself much longer if you keep this up…”

“So don’t fucking control yourself,” comes the growled response in his ear, followed by another bout of Saeran grinding into Zen. Hissing, Zen almost caves but _no_ , not yet. If… if Saeran still wants to do this after, they can. But not yet.

“Babe, I-” he gasps as Saeran drops a hand and traces along the outline of Zen’s hardening shaft before palming it firmly. Oh, sweet temptation. Zen had thought that he was the one with the beast inside but perhaps he’d miscalculated on who was the worst between the two of them. Just because it took Saeran longer to be able to deal with physical sensations didn’t mean he wasn’t a wolf when given the opportunity. Zen groans, exhales heavily and tries again. “Damn, babe, you’re not making this easy on me. I-I have something I want to show you first, before we do anything like this.”

Saeran presses his body against Zen a little more, rolling his hips a few times. “You sure that it needs to come before you?”

“Fffffuuuuck…” Zen’s head falls back against the door and he shakily brings his hands up to Saeran’s shoulders, gently but firmly pushing him back. “When did you learn to talk like that? You’re going to _kill_ me…”

“Guess it comes naturally,” Saeran says, smirking. Zen’s eyes meet his and for a moment Zen’s almost drawn back in before he shakes his head, sliding out from between Saeran and the door.

“Then I suppose I’m in trouble, hmm?” he teases, leaning forward to press a much lighter kiss to Saeran’s lips. He hears the disappointed huff from Saeran as he turns away and suddenly Zen’s not so sure that he’s making the right decision. Maybe if this is what Saeran really wants…

No, no, nope. Zen put a lot of thought into this and it’s an important step in their relationship - at least as important as their first time having sex, if not more. His original plan was to go up on the terrace to do this, but considering how chilly it still is - even for springtime - and how Saeran’s still gazing at him with half-lidded eyes, pupils blown wide with lust, it might just be better to do it inside.

Striding over to the kitchen, Zen pulls out some juice and pours it in two cups. “Do you wanna sit in here or on the couch?” he asks casually as he puts the juice back in the fridge, heart pounding wildly. It’s here, the moment is finally here and he’s nervous as all get out but it needs to happen. Zen needs to tell Saeran how he feels because he’s going to burst if he doesn’t.

When he turns, it’s to see Saeran looking at him through narrowed, suspicious eyes. “That bad, huh?” he asks, accepting the juice when Zen hands it to him.

Zen’s heart drops; even after nearly a year of knowing each other, of Zen showing Saeran he can trust him, Saeran still expects Zen to hurt him at the first given opportunity. Where had the trust gone that he’d been expressing only moments ago? Despite the fact that Zen knows he shouldn’t take it personally, it still stings. “I promise you, it’s nothing bad,” he says, tossing a lopsided smile at Saeran.

Sighing, Saeran trudges over to the couch and drops down, taking a sip of his drink and looking rather sulky. Zen bites his tongue to hold back a laugh; there’s the childish part of him again. It’s convenient that Saeran chose the couch, honestly, since Zen has the gift hidden right there, so Zen goes and sits next to him, not leaving much room between the two of them.

He’s very thankful for his skills as an actor, because without them he’d surely be a bumbling mess of nerves.

“Saeran,” Zen starts, reaching over him to sit his glass down on the stand. “Babe. I… don’t know if you’re aware, but we’ve been a couple for around six months now. Six months in a few days, in a matter of fact.” He pauses, gives Saeran a chance to interject if he wants. He doesn’t, so Zen clears his throat and continues. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately, and I just thought… well. These six months, this past year… it’s all been like a dream come true for me. Excluding a few months in the middle where a certain someone wouldn’t talk to me,” he teases lightly, jabbing Saeran in the side gently. Ah. That at least pulls a small smile out of him, but he’s still not looking at Zen. That won’t do.

Zen reaches out and softly grabs Saeran’s chin, turning his face to meet his eyes. “Saeran. I’ve been holding back for a while now because I didn’t want to overwhelm you, but I don’t think I can anymore.” Saeran’s eyebrows furrow and he sits up a little straighter, leaning toward Zen, attention obviously captured by this. Zen breathes in, breathes out and forges on. “I love you, Saeran. I love you so much that I don’t know if I have the words to express it.” He pauses, laughs quietly. “Wow. I said it, and I don’t want to stop saying it. Not ever. I love you, Saeran. I love you. I love you and I don’t even really care that we’re soulmates, I love you because you’re _you_ and I want to make this work, to make this last.” Zen closes his eyes and presses his forehead against Saeran’s, relief and hope and anticipation racing throughout him. There. It’s out and it feels right, and now all he has to do is wait to see what Saeran thinks.

“...I love you too.”

Zen’s eyes fly open and he sits back a little, just enough to meet Saeran’s gaze. It’s strong and bold, only a hint of fear hidden there. “You… do?” he whispers, awestruck. Of all the possible scenarios his mind had concocted for how this could go, this was one he hadn’t considered. He never thought that Saeran would be near this point emotionally, not yet.

A red tinge creeps across Saeran’s cheek and he looks down, fidgeting a little with his pants. “Of course I do, nerd. Don’t make me say it again,” he grumbles, but Zen can see the sides of those lips fighting to lift into a smile.

He feels like he’s floating, but ah! There’s still one more thing to do. Scooting to the side, Zen reaches over the other end of the couch and grasps blindly until he finds the box he’d placed there. Smiling, he hands it to Saeran, who takes it with a blank look. “What’s this?”

“I got you a present,” Zen says simply, shrugging. “I thought it… I thought it fit an occasion like this.”

Saeran looks at him doubtfully but opens it, confusion passing over his face when he pulls out a little stuffed frog. Zen waits, curious if he’ll get it. The gears are obviously turning in Saeran’s mind and he runs a finger over the soft exterior, not raising his eyes from it when he says in a deadpan, “so I still remind you of a frog, huh?”

Laughter bursts from Zen and he can’t help but pull Saeran into a hug, feeling overjoyed when Saeran laughs quietly, too. “You’re such a fucking nerd. How did I end up with you for my boyfriend?”

Zen hums, pressing kisses to Saeran’s forehead, his nose, his cheeks. “I don’t know but you are one lucky person, babe, to have captured someone this beautiful~”

Saeran snorts and shakes his head. “What am I going to do with you? Oh, I know…” His eyes take on a wicked gleam and he places the frog by the glasses, shoving Zen down on his back. “I know _exactly_ what I’ll do with you.”

“Mmm…” Zen wraps his arms around Saeran and pulls him down as well. “By all means, show me.”

**Author's Note:**

> Did you like it? Did you love it? Did you... *gasp* hate it? Let me know! I'm always open for reviews, comments and helpful criticism.  
> I'm here to grow. :)
> 
> You can also find me on Tumblr as [cutiesaeran](http://cutiesaeran.tumblr.com/) or twitter [@MysticHawke](https://twitter.com/MysticHawke/)!


End file.
